Is my vagina out of control?

My vagina keeps talking to me while I'm trying to sleep at night. It's voice is low and ominous and it won't stop even when I ask it to. Last night I woke up in a bout of sheer pain, and I realized my vagina was eating my hand. I got it our before it ate my thumb and pointer finger, but the other three are gone. I was too embarrassed to tell my doctor what really happened, so I'm turning to all of you. What should I do? I have it covered by a plastic bag right now, but it's quickly eating it's way out! Help!